Friday, October 13, 2006

I should quit my job more often

Its increasingly common knowledge that I'm a short-timer at Outlaw, and by this time next week I'll be unemployed (for a couple days). While playing out the final two weeks of my time here, my duties took me to Pittsburgh with the boss/owner. Two years have passed since I started, and I think its been a good two year run for both myself and the company.

So the boss decided to give me a "last supper" while on the trip, which I took the opportunity to select Morton's Steakhouse. What a tremendous selection it turned out to be.

We sit down and they immediately bring a huge loaf of sourdough bread, which happens to be my favorite. This was a no expense to be spared meal, so we start perusing the menu for pretty much one of everything. The waitress tells us about their specialty desserts that take 30+ minutes to prepare and need to be ordered with dinner. Knowing fully we'd be too full to even think about dessert, we throw caution to the wind and order a couple of these special chocolate cake fudge filled over ice cream concoctions.

Now its time to get serious about selecting a steak. Morton's is a big time steak place. I settle on a NY Strip, which commands $40 something dollars ala carte, add on a caesar salad and some mashed potatoes. Not thinking that would be enough to kill us, Nowell adds some broccoli and sauteed mushrooms.

By the time that my salad arrives, I've already eaten about half the loaf of bread. As I get about half way through my salad, which thankfully showed up with no fries on it, I think to myself "I'm already getting full". Uh oh...

Before I can regroup from the salad, the biggest NY Strip I've ever seen shows up on my table. I take one look at this steak and realize its probably not reasonable for one person to eat this steak, but I'm going to give it the old college try. The steak is cooked absolutely perfect medium-rare, and its as tender as melted butter. Before I know it, I've killed about 3/4ths of it and then I realize there is no stopping with that little left.

Joel 1, Steak 0.

Belly 110% full.

Then dessert arrives. I'm not a big dessert fan, and I really don't like chocolate at all, but despite being chocolate with a warm fudge center, this dish was pretty incredible. I do my best to eat the cake with a minimal amount of the uber-rich fudge, but alas I throw in the white towel with about 1/3rd of it left.

As we stand to leave, I think to myself that I've ever been this full, which says quite a bit since I am a considerable eater. The pain doesn't subside on the short walk back to our hotel, and it only gets worse as I lay around. As I lay on my hotel bed feeling like Takeru_Kobayashi on July 4th, I realized after only 4 days in Pittsburgh I had been assimilated.

Time to get back to Boulder and get on that bike, I've got some work to do.....

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